Little Choices Are a Big Part of Growing Up | Okayrun
Share
Growing up isn't made up of big milestones alone. It also happens in the small decisions children make throughout an ordinary day: which shoes to wear, what game to play, which path to take across the yard, or when they're ready to try something again.
These choices may seem minor to adults, but they give children regular opportunities to express their preferences, explore their interests, and become more comfortable making decisions for themselves.
Everyday Decisions Matter
A child doesn't need to make important decisions to begin learning how choices work. Even deciding between two activities can be a meaningful experience.
Would they rather draw with chalk or play outside? Should the stuffed animals ride along, or will today's game be about finding a parking space? Giving children reasonable options helps them feel involved in what happens next.
Parents can keep these decisions manageable by offering a few suitable choices rather than asking children to figure everything out at once. The aim isn't to let children control every situation, but to give them appropriate opportunities to have a say.
Let Them Take the Lead in Play
Play offers plenty of natural opportunities for children to make decisions. They might choose where a pretend road begins, decide which toy comes along, or change the rules halfway through a game.
Ride-on vehicles can also become part of these everyday choices. In a safe, supervised space, children might decide which direction to take along a marked route or choose between a simple parking activity and a leisurely ride.
Parents can set the boundaries—where riding is allowed, when to stop, and how to use the vehicle safely—while leaving room for children to make smaller decisions within those limits.
Not Every Choice Goes as Planned
Sometimes children change their minds. Sometimes a plan doesn't work, or an activity turns out to be less enjoyable than expected.
These moments are part of learning, too. A child who chooses a game and then decides to try a different one has an opportunity to notice what they enjoy. When something feels difficult, a little encouragement can help them decide whether to try again, ask for help, or take a break.
Rather than immediately stepping in to solve every small problem, parents can ask a gentle question: “What would you like to try next?” This gives children a chance to think through the situation with support nearby.
Support Without Making Every Decision
It can be tempting to choose the quickest or easiest option for children, especially when the day is busy. But leaving room for small decisions doesn't require extra time or elaborate activities.
Try incorporating simple choices into familiar routines:
-
Let children select between two appropriate outfits.
-
Invite them to choose the next book at bedtime.
-
Allow them to help decide which outdoor game to play.
-
Ask which part of a familiar activity they'd like to try first.
Some decisions will still belong to adults, particularly those involving safety, health, or practical limits. Children can learn to make choices while also understanding that boundaries are part of everyday life.
Growing Up Happens in Small Moments
There isn't a single age when children suddenly become confident decision-makers. The process develops gradually through everyday experiences, with guidance from the adults around them.
A small choice may take only a few seconds, but repeated opportunities help children practice expressing preferences, handling changes, and participating in their own routines.
At Okayrun, we believe play should leave room for children to make discoveries in their own way. Whether they're choosing a game, planning an imaginary journey, or deciding what to explore next, these little moments can make an ordinary day feel more personal—and give children more chances to find their own way forward.